The First Eye Roll

The First Eye Roll

Brendan Terrick Just now·1 min read “For Fuck’s Sake! I just showed you how to chip a wheel out of stone last week and what do make, a flipping triangle. That’s really going to make rolling the cart a breeze.” Who was the first person to do the eye roll of exasperation and disillusionment? I would have loved to have seen that. Eye rolling is a provocative tell all indicating that you’re just not the sharpest pencil in the box. It says so much about what the eye roller can tolerate about you, without them saying a single word. It’s brilliant in its simplicity. The next time you see someone roll their eyes at you, ask them, “What’s with the drive by? What did I do to deserve that?” Their response may enlighten you and bring about a change in your behaviour. Unless of course, you get off on people rolling their eyes at you, in which case, by all means carry on. Raven’s Grin by Brendan Terrick Original link(Originally posted by Brendan Terrick)
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Timeless One-Liners

Timeless One-Liners

Photo by nappy from Pexels As I’ve noted before, the escort rank and file is not a good source for wisdom, philosophy, humor or timeless one-liners. Escorts don’t contemplate their station in the universe or time continuum. They’re mostly hedonists who live in the present. Despite, there have been isolated moments of clarity expressed by one person or another from the community I’d like to share today. Actually, the first came not from an escort…but from a distributor of pornography who had a warehouse out in Corona. The outfit specialized in S & M and tranny flicks…and the boss had called into Adam As Eve magazine (a tranny contact tabloid) to purchase an ad hoping he might score some mail orders for his movies from the tranny-chasers who bought that magazine. And I as one of the ad reps, was dispatched to sell the ad. It wasn’t going to be a profitable venture that was for sure. He only wanted a 1/4 page ad which would make me in the neighborhood of 30 bucks in commissions. But at that point in time, I was out in Queens at least once a week taking care of casitas and Asians who were advertising...
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My Life as a Colonial ‘It’ Girl

My Life as a Colonial ‘It’ Girl

Image by Prawny from Pixabay To be a trendsetter, you have to be the first. And if you’re going to be the first at something, it might as well be colonizing a nation. The moment I stepped off that trans-Atlantic cruise onto North American soil, I knew I was going to be somebody. I had an itch to make a name for myself, in addition to an itch from a minor hookworm infection. Both itches were going to get scratched. I started gaining notoriety when I was one of the few colonists that didn’t immediately die. I was still alive, and people took notice. Twenty-first century influencers might think that’s a low bar, but you have no idea the work it took to make a name for myself. You have Instagram? I sat for still life portraits and showed the paintings door-to-door. You have a Twitter account? I stood on a rock and shouted musings at passerby. Your TikTok dance went viral? I went viral with smallpox. My lifestyle brand eventually grew beyond evading death to include food, fashion, and hygiene. Here were some of my hottest tips: If you have leftover corn from the night before, mix it with different...
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3 Reasons Why I’m Not Going to Write About Not Getting the “You Know What”


And I’m not going to mention “you know who” either Photo by Brian Wangenheim on Unsplash As I’m sure most of you have noticed by now, there’s a particular topic that’s enjoyed a flurry of popularity on Medium lately, ever since a select few of us got a pleasant surprise in their bank accounts. Many writers who did, and quite a few who didn’t, were compelled to share their feelings on this, and in doing so, managed to squeeze a few extra bucks out of the experience. Good for them. Tempting as it is, though, I’m not going to follow their lead. Here are my reasons: What else is there to say? At this point, another humblebrag, rant, or head-scratching analysis as to who, how, why, and wherefore is one more too many. Stick a fork in it, folks. It’s done. You’re beginning to bore me. Part of this trend of writing about what I’m not going to write about is an additional trend by those who do to throw in a holla to the god of this universe. They do this, presumably, in an attempt to draw the attention of “He Who Shall Not Be Named” to themselves by turning...
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Welcome Back To Applebee’s, Whether You Like It Or Not

Welcome Back To Applebee’s, Whether You Like It Or Not

How many times have you said to yourself in the last year, “I would give anything to be inside a restaurant right now, even an Applebee’s”? Mike Mozart from Funny YouTube, USA, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons Dear Valued Customers: I am truly excited to be the first to welcome you all back to Applebee’s! In accordance with the new revised CDC Guidelines, many of our over 1,500 stores will again be accepting patrons, and while space is limited, be assured that we promise to maintain that classic Applebee’s experience you’ve grown to love: great food, great service, and great memories, even if we aren’t always your first choice. How many times have you said to yourself in the last year, “I would give anything to be inside a restaurant right now, even an Applebee’s” or “the moment this is all over, I’m running into the closest restaurant, I don’t care if it’s an Applebee’s”? Well, The Applebee’s Gods must have been listening to your prayers, because I’m proud to introduce our all-new “No Judgements Here” specials, including: Welcome-Back Boneless Wings™Been-Gone-Too-Long Burgers™Mar-grrreet-a Your Friends For The First Time In A Year™Satisfy-The-Applebee’s Gods Sliders™ And so much more! That’s right: you...
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Dear Hot Woman in Prague

Dear Hot Woman in Prague

This is us at the Whatever House. Who cares. Let’s go back to your place and 69 some more! (Adobe) Dear hot woman who lives in Prague, I know we’ve exchanged a few friendly notes and even emails about the great writing here on Medium and we’ve kept it strictly business. I went on your social media and saw some photos of you. You are very beautiful. It gave me the idea to come visit Prague. It’s such a coincidence that you are living there. How great. And it is totally not about my fantasy of having hot lesbo sex with you. Not at all! Not at all. And of course, I have no idea if you even listen to Girl in Red. That’s a code, btw. Maybe you don’t even have that code in The Czech Republic. Maybe you have a different code. Do you like Girl in Red, btw? Wait, don’t tell me. I don’t care if you do or you don’t. You know why? Some of my best experiences have been with girls who didn’t even know they liked Girl in Red. Until they met me!!! Ha! But yeah, we can be friends, if I totally strike out...
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The Marriage Wars


Photo by Alfonso Lorenzetto on Unsplash Sarah Sarah maneuvered her car around the potholes in the poorly paved road until it reached the driveway to the trailer park. Driving her SUV slowly so that she could avoid the worst of the potholes, the last trailer in the park finally came into view. Sarah brought the car to a stop in front of a single-wide structure that had seen better days. The trailer didn’t look like much, but it was sturdy and provided a safe place to land after her family’s troubles. Sarah and her husband Sean and their son James moved here a few months ago after the local chicken plant downsized, and Sean lost his job. They could no longer afford the mortgage on the house they had worked so hard to buy. Sarah worked as often as she could as a substitute teacher, but her pay from that job and Sean’s unemployment check didn’t cover all of the bills. Jobs for someone with her skill set were not in abundance here in such a small town. In desperation, she had started a handywoman business to help out with their finances. Her business plan consisted of doing odd jobs that...
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Journeys in Germany: The German Bathroom

Natasha Ferrari Just now·1 min read An outlook shown through short stories about food, culture, travel and humor. All bathrooms are not alike. For example, you’ll notice a few peculiar things about German bathrooms. Klo Brush When you use the toilet, look down and see if you find a toilet brush sitting next to it. 9/10 times you’ll see it sitting there. I originally thought this was to be used only for emergencies, in the case of a clogged toilet. This is wrong-it is definitely to be used and at most times, especially after #2. Germans want their toilets clean and spotless, so make sure you leave the toilet as you found it, otherwise you’ll get a look from the person who goes after you. Bathrooms Autobahn What is better? A clean bathroom that you have to pay for or a dirty bathroom that is free? I hope you chose the first option, because that is basically Germany. Good luck trying to sneak into a Starbucks bathroom or use a department store bathroom. At the least, you’ll have to buy something from the store or give a small amount of change (up to 1 Euro). If you’re driving on the autobahn,...
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The Marriage Wars


Photo by Sandy Millar on Unsplash Riley Riley slammed the front door closed after Sarah left. Furious and in shock, she clutched the envelope that Sarah had delivered. The phone was still playing, “Blighted Love.” She swiped at the screen and opened up the call. She didn’t even say hello; she just held the phone in her hand and stared at the screen. “Hello Riley,” it was Seth’s smooth voice. “How was your day?” he asked as if nothing was wrong! “Are you kidding me? What do you mean, how was my day?” Riley shrieked. “What is the meaning of this? Where are you? And why did you send that hippopotamus to our house?” “You mean Sarah?” Seth replied. “Why I thought that you would love to see your old school friend. Didn’t you have a good reunion?” He asked mockingly. “Are you kidding me?” Riley seethed. “How dare you send her to my house? You know how I feel about her! I don’t need people like Sarah Bentley, knowing where I live. There’s no telling what she would do! She might even come here and try to rob us.” “Where are you?” She demanded. “You’d better come home right now!...
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Writers don’t need to write

Writers don’t need to write
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Skippy von Alte Welt ·Just now Writers don’t need to write They just are He is a scholarly gent inspired by the Republic of Letters, educated in Holland, Heidelberg, and American universities. He loves family, nature, and community. More From Medium Get the Medium app Original link(Originally posted by Skippy von Alte Welt)
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