This was such an awesome personal essay Melanie. I can relate on so many levels. I am 37, and I had to stop going to a very fun weekly Thursday girls night, because I just could not bounce back for days. I’d be groggy, down, fatigued, bleh and just off for a few days afterwards. It started to not matter if I had 1 or 4 — or if I had beer, margaritas, organic liquor, wine spritzers — I’d just feel like shit the next day and for several days after. I really enjoyed hearing your heart even transition back and forth while you were writing this. I know what the opposing voices in your conscience feels like. I’m cheering you on no matter what you decide is the best lifestyle and amount for yourself.